I have seen these 6 common sins of first message writing committed over and over, ruining any chances that may have been had between the guilty party and the victim. If you are serious about finding dates online, please be certain you aren’t committing any of the following common mistakes when contacting your potential date:
6. Filling your message with clichés
Remember, the goal of a first message to a potential date is to separate your message from all the other messages in their inbox. So please, stay away from the common clichés that turn up in every other message such as “This is my first time using a dating site” or “I am looking for Mr./Mrs. Right.”
5. Rewriting your profile in your message
You told us your interests, what you are looking for, and all about your cat on your profile. Please don’t repeat info that can be found on your profile in your message (aside from signing your name at the end of it). If your potential date reads the message and wants to know more about you, they will head over to your profile to find out.
4. Overdosing on physical compliments
Be careful while dishing out those physical compliments, Romeo. First off, it is obvious that you find the message recipient at least somewhat attractive, since you are messaging them. Although everyone loves being complimented, when you load your first message with them, you may come across shallow. Instead of laying it on thick with physical compliments, why don’t you compliment your potential date’s extensive spoon collection, or their awesome taste in music?
3. Using slang, bad grammar, and chatspeak
You never hear, “he had me at ‘Yo sexi, howz r u?!’” That is because these messages don’t land you a date, let alone the love of your life. Oh, aNd WhiLe wE ARe On tHe ToPic, pLeaSe RefrAin FroM TyPiNg LikE ThiS. How about showing your potential date that you can properly construct a sentence?
2. Cut, Paste, Repeat-ing
Do not cut and paste the same generic message to a bunch of people. It’s not as smooth as you think; trust me, we notice. Make sure you write each message for the specific person you are mailing. No recycling here, buddy.
1. Being vulgar
Unless you are on a site that specializes in purely sexual relationships, please leave details of all the naughty things that you would like to do to your potential date out of the message. Along with those details, leave your bra size, penis measurements, or worse yet, graphic photos out of this message as well.
What sins have you experienced? Share them with us in the comments.
For the “Do’s” of first message writing, check out:
6 Simple Steps to Writing a First Message That Will Get a Response
Happy Sin-Free Messaging!